Current:Home > MyPeople are talking to their dead loved ones – and they can't stop laughing. It's a refreshing trend. -ThriveEdge Finance
People are talking to their dead loved ones – and they can't stop laughing. It's a refreshing trend.
View
Date:2025-04-15 16:22:50
Everyone grieves differently – and if you've spent any time on TikTok in recent days, you might have noticed some unexpected, unusual methods.
Some people – to the tune of millions of likes – are confessing or sharing stories with their dead loved ones directly on social media. In one such video, two sisters laugh through telling their mom what's happened since she died. "We didn't know that we had to file your taxes," one says, stifling a laugh before later breaking into fits of laughter. Another video features two pals keeping their deceased best friend up-to-date on the latest gossip – including Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce.
What these videos have in common: smiles instead of frowns. Joy instead of heartbreaking pain. The spilling of secrets instead of spilling of tears.
Grief experts welcome this type of public healing, for both the bereaved and those watching who may learn something in the process. "What I love about it so much is that it normalizes grief, No. 1, but it also shows that grief is so much more than just crying and sadness and laying in your bed and not being able to get up," says Gina Moffa, licensed clinical social worker and author of "Moving On Doesn't Mean Letting Go." "It shows that the relationship continues. It shows how a relationship continues, it shows that it doesn't all have to be sadness and upset and despair."
TikTok as grief resource? 'Fantastic'
Grief is not one-size-fits-all.
It's "a lifelong process," says Jessica MacNair, licensed professional counselor. "It's not prescriptive, it's not, five stages in order, you move through these, and then you reach the end. It's ongoing, it comes up in varying times. And, in fact, I mean, that's probably one of the main reasons that people come back to therapy."
Any avenue people can discover to work through their grief – that doesn't involve harming others or themselves – is a good idea. Even on social media.
"If somebody finds something that is effective for them, and it helps them feel better, I love that for them," MacNair adds. "And if people can come on TikTok and see something that worked for somebody else and try that for themselves, that's fantastic."
'Wanted to share my experience'
Of course, people also grieve (slightly) more traditionally on TikTok. Devon Faith Hages, for example, shared a more melancholy video earlier this year where she said she sends messages to her dead best friend's cell phone. She sends him a text or Snapchat a few times a year after he visits her in dreams.
"Every time I dream of him, it's very vivid. It's very raw. It's very painful," says the 24-year-old foster care worker. "And they're unlike other dreams that I've had before because he and I actually maintain conversations. And I can feel him touching me and we hug in our dreams."
Her grief emboldens her to reach out: "When I first wake up from these dreams, the grief derails me for my entire day, because they're so real. So pretty much immediately after I wake up, and I'm just sitting in this grief and this pain, I text him."
Why turn to social media to tell her story? She saw others on TikTok posting about their loved ones who died, "texting them or leaving them a voicemail or getting like a random phone call from a phone number of a dead person, of someone that they loved. So I hopped on that and wanted to share my experience."
More on grief:My dog died two months ago. Pet loss causes deep grief that our society ignores.
'Just because we laugh doesn't mean we don't miss someone'
No matter how people are grieving on TikTok, one thing is clear, according to Moffa: "People die but relationships don't."
She hopes this TikTok trend continues because each generation must learn to not run away in fear of loss; we can approach grief in our own ways, including through humor.
"Just because we laugh doesn't mean we don't miss someone," she says. "Because we laugh doesn't mean that we're not grieving still."
Keep in mind that grief will manifest in different ways than you imagine over time – often unpredictably so.
"Grief will come when it comes," Moffa says. "And that may mean that you have grief, two years later, that comes up that feels like it's the first time that you're grieving, or some memory will come up. And it will be something that you have to grieve all over again."
Maybe it will involve laughter. Maybe tears. Either way, it keeps a loved one's memory alive.
And maybe that's all that matters, anyway.
If you'd like to share your thoughts on grief with USA TODAY for possible use in a future story, please take this survey here.
Other avenues:Her son died, and she felt alone. In her grief, she found YouTube.
veryGood! (736)
Related
- What do we know about the mysterious drones reported flying over New Jersey?
- Beyoncé's BeyGood charity donates $100K to Houston law center amid Jay
- One Tech Tip: How to protect your communications through encryption
- Off the Grid: Sally breaks down USA TODAY's daily crossword puzzle, Dropping Hints
- The 401(k) millionaires club keeps growing. We'll tell you how to join.
- Secretary of State Blinken is returning to the Mideast in his latest diplomatic foray
- Wisconsin kayaker who faked his death and fled to Eastern Europe is in custody, online records show
- The brewing recovery in Western North Carolina
- FACT FOCUS: Inspector general’s Jan. 6 report misrepresented as proof of FBI setup
- Biden commutes roughly 1,500 sentences and pardons 39 people in biggest single
Ranking
- 'Survivor' 47 finale, part one recap: 2 players were sent home. Who's left in the game?
- Morgan Wallen sentenced after pleading guilty in Nashville chair
- Supreme Court allows investors’ class action to proceed against microchip company Nvidia
- The Sundance Film Festival unveils its lineup including Jennifer Lopez, Questlove and more
- Trump wants to turn the clock on daylight saving time
- What was 2024's best movie? From 'The Substance' to 'Conclave,' our top 10
- Travis Kelce Praises Taylor Swift For Making Eras Tour "Best In The World"
- We can't get excited about 'Kraven the Hunter.' Don't blame superhero fatigue.
Recommendation
Paige Bueckers vs. Hannah Hidalgo highlights women's basketball games to watch
Stock market today: Asian shares advance, tracking rally on Wall Street
'September 5' depicts shocking day when terrorism arrived at the Olympics
'Vanderpump Rules' star DJ James Kennedy arrested on domestic violence charges
McKinsey to pay $650 million after advising opioid maker on how to 'turbocharge' sales
Alex Jones keeps Infowars for now after judge rejects The Onion’s winning auction bid
This house from 'Home Alone' is for sale. No, not that one.
Atmospheric river and potential bomb cyclone bring chaotic winter weather to East Coast